Pakistani Wedding

cIn arranged marriages, it is said, “You do not marry the one you love, you love the one you marry.” Arranged marriages tend to focus on a person’s status, trustworthiness, and kindness.

An unshakeable marriage builds on tolerance for the other. No one is perfect. In the West, we often look for the right person and hold that person to the standard of perfection. In arranged marriages, the couple is not together through love, so it is assumed the other will not always meet one’s expectations. It is thus easier to tolerate shortcomings.

In Pakistan, arranged marriages are still the norm and are lavish festivals spanning four days. The first day is the “Mayoon.” From this day on, until the wedding, the bride and groom do not meet. Everyone wears brilliant yellow clothing, and the celebrations begin with singing and dancing.

On the “Mehndi,” or the second day of the wedding ceremony, celebrations continue, and the bride and groom’s hands and feet are decorated and tattooed in intricate patterns with henna. The bride applies “ubtan,” a paste made from turmeric, sandalwood powder, herbs, and aromatic oils, to give herself a glowing complexion.

Leading up to the fourth day, all participants of the wedding wear red. Gifts, jewelry, and flowers adorn people as colors mix with the aromas of feasts and flowers. On the day of the wedding, the groom unveils the bride and congratulations are given. The bride now leaves her family for the groom’s. In contrast to the West, at the end of the wedding, the bride is often in tears

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